Since my job is resulting in me becoming more of a reader, I picked up the book "Tuesdays With Morrie" which has been laying around our house for years. I think most everyone in the family has read it but me. It is a wonderful book - puts life in perspective and all. But mostly I thought about my dad while reading it.
Some of the things the author describes were so familiar to me that I got quite emotional. For example, Mitch wanted to be of more help to Morrie as time went on, so the nurse taught him how to move Morrie from what spot to another, since he couldn't walk anymore. I remember a nurse showing my Mom and I how to move my dad in that same exact way because his legs would not work anymore. Unfortunately my Mom and I just couldn't manage it. So, Reggie would go to the apartment every day before work and move my Dad from his bed to the couch, and then stop by after work to move him from the couch to the bed. This lasted about a week as my Dad's condition deteriorated very fast and he passed a week later.
I think my Dad was a good example of some of the things Morrie taught Mitch. My dad did not try to run from death. He did not want to linger, but he was brave and willing to accept help for as long as was needed.
As the book was coming to an end I knew that I couldn't finish it at work. I knew I needed to be alone with the book and my emotions. Morrie getting to the point where it was hard to talk, impossible to eat much of anything, being given morphine to ease the pain, slipping into a coma and his family taking turns for a 24 hour bedside vigil - all very familiar. There was one thing, though, that was the opposite of my Dad's experience. Somehow, even with several people in the house at the time, Morrie slipped away in a rare moment of solitude. Mitch said that is exactly how he wanted it. For my Dad, my Mom and I were right by his side. Since other family had taken their turns at my Dad's bedside, I have always felt a little guilty that I was the child there to see him take his last breath. But I cherish the moment nonetheless. It was a sacred moment that I will never forget.
There are a few quotes from Morrie in the book that I found very profound and would like to remember:
"Aging is decay, but it is also growth". To me that speaks of how much wiser and better we become as we have lived and learned so much.
"Death ends a life, not a relationship." Whether you take that to be about spirituality or just about lasting memories, I think it is absolutely true.
So thank you Mitch Albom for writing this book, and thank you Morrie for sharing your wisdom. Reading it was a very worthwhile experience.
